


Tangled In The Net

by Aislashu



Series: In The Net [3]
Category: Free!
Genre: Angst, Biting, Blood, Break Up, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Roller Coaster, Fist Fights, Free! Kink Meme, Frottage, Hurt/Comfort, Kissing, M/M, Mental Breakdown, Panic Attacks, Public Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-27
Updated: 2014-05-24
Packaged: 2017-12-24 20:51:18
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 11,808
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/944514
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aislashu/pseuds/Aislashu
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Makoto and Haru have broken up. Rin's being his typical asshat self. Haru is having a hard time coping. Will he ever be able to get Rin back? What does he have to do? Will his friendship with Makoto really be ok? For the first time in his life, Haru has to tackle emotional issues head on, and he's not quite sure where to turn...what happens when it all becomes too much?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Time Apart

**Author's Note:**

> Tangled In The Net begins! And of course, it's not easy...
> 
> Enjoy!

    Sunday morning came to find Haru sitting on the floor, the book about sharks and dolphins open in his lap to reveal the small photo strip. His fingertips grazed each photo lightly, lingering over the one with the kiss. What had happened to Rin to make him act the way he did? Haru couldn't bring himself to believe that one race was the cause of it all.   
  
    "Haru-chan?"  
  
    He tensed, fingers gripping the book, then he forced himself to relax. He wasn't dating Makoto anymore, and he didn't have to hide this. Haru looked up as Makoto walked in from the bathroom, surprised not to find him in the tub. When Makoto sat cross-legged on the floor in front of him, he silently passed the book over to the other boy. He watched Makoto take it, obviously curious, and look down, eyes widening at the pictures, before Makoto's gentle smile crossed his lips.   
  
    "I...don't think I've ever seen you smile like that," Makoto said quietly. "I never had a chance, did I?"  
  
    Haru looked away. He still felt ashamed, but it felt nice to finally share some things with Makoto.   
  
    "But..that's ok, Haru..." Makoto looked down, touching the last picture with Haru's smile. "Because now I understand."  
  
    Haru looked over at Makoto and nodded softly, reaching out and taking the book back. He closed it, and Makoto caught the cover, laughing softly.  
  
    "Was that Rin's idea...the book you used?"  
  
    "No...the picture was our goodbye."  
  
    "You bought the book."  
  
    Haru flushed softly and put it back onto the shelf, getting to his feet. He waited for Makoto to stand, then turned, heading downstairs to start breakfast.   
  
    "Is Nagisa coming?"  
  
    "No...not this morning. He'll probably drop by later, though."  
  
    "Did you talk to him?"  
  
    "Yeah..." Makoto nodded, smiling softly. "I did."  
  
    Haru got out the mackerel, preparing it to cook. He glanced over his shoulder at Makoto, and the other boy just laughed.  
  
    "And I decided that I don't need to jump from one relationship right into another. Especially not when I don't know how I feel about Nagisa."  
  
    I don't want to do to him what you did to me. Haru looked away. Makoto didn't have to say it, really. Haru could pick up on unspoken cues with Makoto as well as Makoto could with him.   
  
    "Plus, I need to figure out...what caused me to act like I did."  
  
    I don't want to do to him what I did to you. Haru nodded, placing the fish onto the small grill, listening to it crackle as it cooked. He could feel Makoto's eyes on him, and for some reason it was bothering him. Something was wrong. But he figured it was just his imagination, after all he'd been through. He took the spatula and put the fish onto the plate.  
  
    "Haru-chan..."  
  
    Something was wrong.  
  
    "I..."  
  
    Very wrong.  
  
    Makoto almost lost his nerve, watching Haru become still as a statue.   
  
    "I think I need to be away from you for a while," Makoto said quickly.   
  
    Haru couldn't breathe. He had a death-grip on the plate, staring at the wall ahead of him. This wasn't happening, it was a dream. A nightmare. He was asleep.   
  
    "So we both can heal," Makoto said, while Haru was quiet."We'll still see each other at school, you know..and practice..." Makoto rushed on.  
  
    Haru inhaled sharply, trying to breathe. The sweat was beading on his forehead, and the plate was shaking. No..not the plate...his hand. Haru gasped again, trying to breathe, but his chest was too tight. Why couldn't he breathe? He wasn't under water. His fingers lost their grip and the plate crashed to the floor, but he didn't notice. He was trying to breathe. Trying to stop the shaking.   
  
    I can't lose you too.  
  
    That will never happen.  
  
    I need to be away from you.  
  
    "Haru..." Makoto jumped from his seat as Haru staggered and dropped to his knees.  
  
    Haru was gasping for breath, eyes wide but unseeing. Makoto rushed forward, seeing Haru shaking almost violently. Haru was braced against the floor with one hand, the other gripping the apron over the tightness in his chest. His breathing was fast and ragged, and when Makoto knelt beside him Haru jerked away.  
  
    "Haru!" Makoto's eyes were wide. "Haru, relax!"  
  
    When Makoto reached for him again Haru let out a strangled cry and lashed out, knocking Makoto's hand back. He had a flash of that hand across his face. Those large hands gripping his arms. Haru was gasping for breath, he could feel his heart pounding in his chest. He felt weak, shaking in his own skin.   
  
    I've never seen you so bruised and helpless.  
  
    I'm going to make you mine.  
  
    "Haru-chan...calm down! Haru, please!" Makoto pleaded desperately, shocked.   
  
    Makoto held up his hands, but Haru was too far out of it. He moved closer and just barely dodged a swing of Haru's fist before Haru flipped around and scrambled up the stairs on all fours, desperate to escape. Makoto knew better than to follow that time. He couldn't get through to Haru right now. Makoto picked up his phone.  
  
    "Nagisa...? I need your help...it's an emergency. No....not me..Haru. Please, get here fast." Makoto hung up and frowned, looking up the stairs towards Haru's room.   
  
  
    Haru didn't know how much time had passed. He'd managed to get into his room and tucked himself into a corner near his bed, hugging his knees to his chest tightly and rocking back and forth. He flinched when his door opened, but it was Nagisa who came inside quietly, standing at the door.   
  
    "Haru-chan...can I come over?" Nagisa asked softly, subdued.   
  
    Haru looked at Nagisa and looked away, hugging his knees tighter to his chest. Nagisa came forward slowly, kneeling down next to Haru, facing him, resting a hand on the boy's back. Haru stilled, but didn't move away, burying his face into his knees. He wasn't trembling as badly as he had before, but Nagisa could still feel it under his hand. He rubbed Haru's back slowly.   
  
    "Are you ok?" Nagisa paused, then smiled a bit. "Guess that's a stupid question, huh Haru-chan?"  
  
    "Drop the -chan," Haru murmured against his knees.   
  
    "That's the Haru I know," Nagisa giggled softly and kept rubbing the boy's back gently. "He's still going to be your friend, you know."  
  
    "He's leaving me."  
  
    "No...it's not the same, Haru-chan. He needs to heal. Don't you?"  
  
    Haru hugged his knees tightly, burying his face against his knees more. He didn't want to admit any such thing. And he didn't want to be away from Makoto. Makoto had always been there, no matter what.   
  
    "Do you remember taking a swing at him?" Nagisa asked quietly.   
  
    Haru tensed, and he felt Nagisa shift behind him, somehow fitting between his back and the wall. He felt the boy's hands on his shoulders, starting to massage them slowly, forcing him to relax.   
  
    "Why did you try so hard to get away from him? What do you remember?"  
  
    "I..." Haru swallowed hard. "He said...he said he was leaving." It didn't matter that it wasn't those exact words. It was the gist of it. "And then...I remembered him hitting me..." Haru whispered.   
  
    Nagisa slid his arms around Haru, hugging him gently from behind. He rested his chin on Haru's shoulder, just hugging the other boy. Haru was breathing a little easier, and didn't feel as tense.   
  
    "See? You need to heal, too. It doesn't mean you stop being friends, and it doesn't mean he'll never see you again. It's Mako-chan! He can't ever abandon you."  
  
    Haru frowned, tilting his head to rest it against Nagisa's. The other boy was right, he knew. But he was being selfish. He didn't want Makoto out of his life for any length of time. It wasn't the same, seeing him at school or at practice. But he also knew it was more for Makoto's sake, the boy had been so in love with him. How would he feel if it had been him instead? Perhaps it was his penance for what he'd done. And if Makoto didn't want to come back to him at all after, could he really blame the other boy? It's what he was afraid of.  
  
    "You're his water, Haru-chan..."  
  
    Haru blinked in surprise and turned his head a bit to look at Nagisa. Nagisa was smiling at him brightly, shaking his head.  
  
    "He can't ever leave you because you're his water. He could live without you about as well as you could live without water, Haru-chan."  
  
    Nagisa extracted himself carefully and moved around, holding his hand out to Haru. Haru took it, gently pulling himself to his feet. He still felt a bit dizzy and shaky.   
  
    "Did he..."  
  
    "He's still here. You scared the shit out of him, Haru-chan! But he's making mackerel for you. With pineapple, even! And you probably need to eat. He almost called Rin, you know. But then he thought that would make it worse, not be romantic. Rin-chan would probably say something stupid."   
  
    Nagisa took Haru's hand, gently tugging him towards the door. He had no intention of giving Haru a chance to talk, however.  
  
    "Then he thought about calling Gou! But he figured she'd walk in and see your triceps and just stare and talk about how amazing they are, and he didn't think you wanted to deal with that, either. I was the last resort!" Nagisa put on a large pout. "Can you believe that? I was the last one! It's not fair. I did good, didn't I Haru-chan?"  
  
    Haru just stared at the boy and looked away, but he squeezed Nagisa's hand. Nagisa grinned brightly and pulled Haru down to the dining area. Nagisa looked back when he felt Haru stop, the boy's eyes on the dining table. Nagisa looked back, confused. What was wrong with the three plates on the table?      
  
    "Haru-chan...?" Nagisa asked nervously, frowning.  
  
    "I want a bath," Haru let go of Nagisa's hand and turned. He was already at the top of the stairs before Nagisa had the chance to protest.  
  
    "Where did Haru go?" Makoto asked, heading in from the kitchen.  
  
    "He went to take a bath...he saw the table and just left," Nagisa frowned, still confused.  
  
    "Damn it," Makoto muttered, mentally kicking himself.   
  
    "What?"  
  
    "It's nothing. I just...nevermind, Nagisa. I'll be right back, ok?"  
  
    Makoto squeezed Nagisa's shoulder and made his way upstairs. Nagisa shrugged and sat down, pulling all three plates in front of his spot and rubbing his hands together while Makoto went up and knocked on the bathroom door.  
  
    "Haru...? It's me..."  
  
    Silence.  
  
    "May I come in? Please?"  
  
    Silence.   
  
    Makoto sighed and slid the door open slowly, to find the tub filled and Haru already in it. Haru looked over at him and then looked down into the water. Makoto stepped forward carefully, moving nice and slow, afraid to send Haru into another fit. He got close enough to the tub to see Haru was holding the dolphin statue Makoto had given him two years ago. Makoto tried to swallow the lump suddenly in his throat.   
  
    "Please understand, Haru..." Makoto watched Haru's grip tighten on the statue, "I would never abandon you. You know that."  
  
    Haru stared into the water, watching the rippling light play over the statue underneath its surface. He didn't love Makoto, so why did letting him go have to hurt so much?   
  
    "I...I'm not your parents..." Makoto sighed and turned, sitting down so his back was to the tub, pressed against the side. "I'm not...Rin...but, God...don't I wish I was, so you could love me like you do him..."  
  
    Haru turned his head, staring at the back of Makoto's. The boy had buried his face in his hands, and Haru looked back into the water. He was still hurting Makoto. He was so selfish. Haru really didn't like change...and so much had recently. He knew it was for the best. He knew Makoto needed it. He just...needed to let go.  But still his fingers tightened on the statue.   
  
    "I...I love you so much, Haru-chan..." Makoto sniffled, and Haru could tell the boy was trying so hard not to just sob. "But how...how can I let you go...how can I..how can I get over you, get over what you were to me...when I'm alone with you so much? When you're always there...please, Haru..."  
  
    Makoto's sob covered the sound of the statue thunking against the bottom of the tub. Haru stared at his empty hands and then looked up at the ceiling. He wasn't going to break Makoto again. He'd promised himself that. For Makoto's sake...and, really, for his...he had to let the boy go. Sighing, he turned to look at the back of the boy's head..and soaked it with a splash from the tub.  
  
    Makoto's eyes shot open as he was suddenly drenched with water...totally unexpected. He wiped at his eyes and turned to look at Haru. Haru looked away, then looked back, giving a small nod. Makoto's shoulders relaxed, and the smile on his face was both happy and sad. They'd be all right, in time. He reached out, touching Haru's hair...and then Haru's eyes went wide as he was suddenly dunked under the water. Laughing softly, Makoto got up and moved out of ranger.  
  
    "That's for the splash, Haru-chan!" he called as Haru surfaced, gasping.  
  
    "Drop the -chan!" Haru stood up out of the tub and grabbed a towel, frowning. "Did you leave Nagisa alone with the food?"  
  
    The look on Makoto's face said it all, and Haru huffed, frowning.   
  
    "You realize he probably ate it all, right?"  
  
    Makoto nodded sheepishly, scratching the back of his neck.  
  
    "Fine," Haru sighed and started to dry off. "You're buying me soba, then. With shrimp."  
  
    "What about Nagisa?"  
  
    "Guess you're buying his, too."   
  
    Haru walked by Makoto into his bedroom to get changed. Makoto stared at the door and sighed, smiling again. It was going to be hard, he knew. But he also knew that in the end, he and Haru were going to be ok. No matter how much time it took.


	2. Shattered

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Haru ends up babysitting Ren for a brief time. When Makoto returns to collect him, Ren begs them to get back together, and a misinterpretation causes a large rift between Haru and Makoto, and another meeting with Rin further chips away at him. 
> 
> Once broken, can the pieces be put back together?

    The next few days were hell for Haru. He'd been so used to seeing Makoto every morning, you could set your clock by Makoto's visits. He'd been late for school the first day, soaking in the tub, having forgotten that Makoto wasn't going to be there to remind him. School was a little awkward, too, especially when people started asking why they stopped dating. Haru would simply stare at them quietly until they walked away.  
  
    He'd promised to give Makoto time to heal. He only needed water. Haru only half-listened to Nagisa ramble on about trying to find their fourth member, and how he was working someone over to try and get them to join. Wednesday after school they found out it was because the guy had a girly name. He'd never figure out the way Nagisa's brain worked. He did notice the look in Nagisa's eyes as the blonde boy eyed this Rei, however, and he shifted his look towards Makoto.  
  
    "Something wrong, Haru-chan?" Makoto asked.  
  
    "No. I'm going home."  
  
    Haru turned and left, leaving them to watch the other teen's track practice. The first thing he wanted to do when he got home was soak in the tub. He still hadn't figured out a way to get Rin back. Rin only showed semblances of his old self when he was hurt, but Haru wasn't stupid enough to push himself to such insane lengths. He was almost home though, passing Makoto's house and starting up the steps of the shrine when Makoto's door opened.  
  
    "Oh...Haru-chan!"   
  
    Haru inwardly cringed and stopped, turning to look at Makoto's mother questioningly. Makoto's mother stepped out, smiling at him, and Ren peeked out from behind her, grinning brightly and waving at Haru.  
  
    "Haru-chan, I hate to be a bother but I have to take Ran shopping, and Makoto's not home yet, Ren doesn't want to go and he saw you pass, and you know he adores you so but I really hate to impose, but would you mind watching him for a little while? It's just until Makoto comes back, at least, and then he can take over, and I'd really appreciate it..."  
  
    "PLEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAASEEEEEE?" Ren looked at Haru hopefully.  
  
    Haru sighed softly. It looked like the bath would have to wait. He nodded and inclined his head towards his house, and Ren jumped up and down, cheering. He kissed his mom goodbye and then ran up to join Haru, taking the older boy's hand.   
  
    "Thank you so much, Haru!"   
  
    He nodded again to Makoto's mother and headed up the steps, turning off them about halfway up to the Shrine and opening the door to his house, leading Ren in and to the living room.  Ren jumped onto the couch and started swinging his legs happily while Haru set up his game system, putting on a racing game and handing Ren a controller. After a little over an hour of playing, Ren took Haru by surprise...  
  
    "Are you sad?"  
  
    "What?" Haru paused the game, looking at Ren.  
  
    "I know you and Mako-chan broke up...and Mako-chan is sad."  
  
    Haru looked away and set his controller aside. His eyes widened when a weight was in his lap, Ren having moved into it and hugging him tightly. Haru looked down and rested his hand on Ren's head gently, and the boy looked up at him, smiling.  
  
    "It's okay to be sad, you know."  
  
    "I know," Haru nodded.  
  
    Ren hugged Haru tighter and rested his head on the other boy's chest, and Haru gently wrapped his arms around Ren's shoulders.   
  
    "At night, when he thinks everyone's asleep...I hear Mako-chan crying in his room."  
  
    Haru tensed, fingers curling into the fabric of Ren's shirt.   
  
    "I wish I could help him," Ren sniffled softly. "But I don't know what to do. Big brother's not supposed to cry. What do I do, Haru-chan?"  
  
    "I...don't know," Haru admitted quietly, kissing the top of Ren's head. "He'll...be okay. It's Makoto."  
  
    "I'm still worried."  
  
    Haru squeezed Ren gently, staring at the paused game screen. Makoto cried at night, and it killed him to know that. He'd tried to push Makoto towards Nagisa...but now Nagisa was focused on that guy Rei...he saw it in Nagisa's eyes. Haru was worried, too.   
  
    "He'll be okay," Haru said again, for Ren's sake. He wasn't going to say he was worried, too...it would make Ren worry more.  
  
    Ren nodded against his chest, and then...the boy was zonked out. Haru sighed quietly and held the sleeping boy, glancing at the clock. Shouldn't Makoto be back by now? He was just about to reach for his phone when his door opened and Makoto walked in, looking around. He waved idly when Makoto stepped in to the living room and Makoto blinked, smiling when he saw Haru pretty much stuck with Ren in his lap.  
  
    "Thanks, Haru."  
  
    Haru nodded, shaking Ren awake gently.  
  
    "Makoto's here."  
  
    Ren blinked awake and looked over, smiling widely before he slid off Haru's lap, running over and hugging Makoto tightly around the waist. Haru stood back, watching as Makoto hugged back, chuckling softly.   
  
    "C'mon, Ren...we should head home."  
  
    "But...don't you want to spend time with Haru-chan?"  
  
    Haru looked away, and the smile froze on Makoto's face. Ren looked between them, almost desperately.  
  
    "You two should kiss and make up! The fight can't be that bad!"  
  
    "Ren..." Haru looked back at the boy.  
  
    "You and Niichan were so happy together! Now you're both sad..."  
  
    "Ren..." Makoto frowned, gripping the boy's shoulders. "Ren, don't."  
  
    "But Niichan...it's Haru! He's sad too..."  
  
    "Ren, stop." Makoto's fingers tightened on the boy's shoulders, the pain evident.   
  
    "But..."  
  
    Neither Ren nor Makoto had noticed Haru's movement, but suddenly Haru's hand was gripping Makoto's wrist as the older boy's hand started to lift off of Ren's shoulder. The grip was like iron, and Haru's nails were digging into Makoto's skin. Haru noticed the hurt and frustrated look on Makoto's face when Ren wouldn't back down. Makoto let out a pained sound and looked at his wrist, then looked up at Haru, and the hurt in Makoto's eyes deepened.   
  
    "Haru-chan?" Ren was confused, seeing the boy suddenly at his side, gripping Makoto's wrist like that.   
  
    "You really thought..."  
  
    Haru let go of Makoto's and the boy jerked it back, standing up. Haru hadn't thought, he'd just reacted. Now he'd fucked up, and bad. He could see Makoto trembling with barely-suppressed rage. Haru opened his mouth but Makoto put a hand up to stop him from speaking.  
  
    "Don't. Don't say anything to me right now. Ren, we're going home." Makoto took Ren's hand and pulled him out, Ren looking sad and confused, tears in his eyes. He gave Haru a sad wave before Makoto pulled him out, slamming the door behind them.  
  
    Haru closed his eyes, taking slow, deep breaths. He had just fucked things up, he knew. He was trying not to panic and kept taking deep breaths to calm down. He walked out of his house once he was sure Makoto would be gone and made his way down the road. He just made one of the last trains, and then it wasn't long before he was standing in front of Samezuka Academy, staring up at Rin's window. He pulled out his phone and looked down, pressing Rin's name and holding it to his ear, listening to it ring.   
  
    "What do you want?" Rin's voice snapped at the other end.  
  
    Haru closed his eyes, having doubted that Rin would answer. But he said nothing.  
  
    "Well? I don't have all night."  
  
    Haru opened his eyes, just holding his phone. He wished so badly for the old Rin. But Rin was pushing him away, and now he'd pushed Makoto away. Makoto had been the only one he could turn to, and he'd screwed that up.  
  
    "...Haru?" Rin's voice was a little more worried now.  
  
    Haru turned his head to look back up at Rin's window. He watched Rin step up to the window, holding his phone, and Rin looked out, spotting him. Their eyes locked and then Haru hung up, lowering his phone and just watching Rin. Rin turned and moved away from the window.  Haru sat down on the bench, soon joined by Rin.  
  
    "You're such a bother," Rin said as he sat down next to Haru.  "What do you want?"  
  
    Haru looked over at Rin and sighed softly, looking away. He was stupid to have come, he knew that. Today was his day for stupidity. He couldn't talk to Rin...he definitely couldn't tell Rin about what had just happened with Makoto. He shook his head, getting to his feet.  
  
    "Forget it. It was stupid for me to come."  
  
    Rin grabbed Haru's hand when he moved by, and Haru paused, looking down at Rin.   
  
    "You didn't come all this way to just leave."  
  
    "No...but who I came for isn't around anymore." Haru drew his hand back and turned away. "And sooner or later...who he left behind won't be around anymore, either."   
  
    Haru walked away, and Rin was almost going to let him, until those words sank in. Then he was on his feet and sprinting after Haru, getting in front of the other boy and grabbing the front of his shirt.  
  
    "What do you mean by that!?" Rin demanded. "You can't say shit like that and just walk away!"   
  
    Haru was practically lifted onto his toes by Rin's grip on his shirt, and he just stared coolly at the other boy.   
  
    "What do you care?" Haru pulled Rin's hands off his shirt and stepped away.   
  
    "I...I don't!" Rin frowned, crossing his arms.   
  
    "I'm starting to believe that." Haru's voice was more than just monotone...it was hollow. When he moved passed Rin and started walking away, Rin didn't stop him.   
  
      
    Haru walked up to school the next day, stopping when Makoto blocked his path. Haru could tell Makoto was still angry, and he couldn't remember a time when Makoto had ever looked at him with such hostility. Anything that may have been said, however, was interrupted by Nagisa coming up in a red jogging suit.  
  
    "What are you doing?"  
  
    "Haru-chan! Mako-chan!" Nagisa panted hard, catching his breath. "Oh...Rei-chan!"  
  
    "Are you Haru-chan-san?" Rei asked.  
  
    Haru's eye twitched and he turned hard eyes over to Rei.  
  
    "Don't put -chan AND -san on my name," Haru said, annoyed.   
  
    Rei agreed to join the Swim Club on trial conditions for the joint practice Gou had gotten for them. Haru looked away and moved around Rei, heading into the school. Nagisa frowned, giving Makoto a questioning look, and Makoto just shook his head. The distance between the two once-best-friends was obvious even to outsiders, and lunch was a very awkward affair between Makoto, Haru, Nagisa, and Gou.  
  
    "So for once, I've gotten a lot of messages from Rin, starting last night..." Gou began, almost nervously.  
  
    "Really?" Nagisa's voice sounded excited.   
  
    "He...wanted me to tell him if you showed up or not today, Haru..."  
  
    Haru's eyes widened and he looked away. He could feel everyone's eyes on him.   
  
    "He seemed worried...you went to Samezuka last night?"  
  
    "That's pretty far Haru-chan...what happened?" Nagisa watched Haru.  
  
    "No...it's nothing. I'm fine."  
  
    "You're not! You and Makoto aren't even looking at each other!"  
  
    "Did...you two...fight....again?" Gou asked nervously.  
  
    "No. He didn't hit me."  
  
    "But he may as well have beat me, thinking I'd smack Ren!" Makoto finally said, seething.  
  
    Nagisa and Gou looked on in shock, mouths open.   
  
    "The marks still fading on me say you have no problem hitting someone close to you," Haru's voice was quiet, cold as steel. "Ren was pushing you. You had that same look on your face before you hit me. I saw your hand let go and raise, I acted."  
  
    Makoto pushed to his feet and Haru was quickly upon his own. Nagisa and Gou shouted, getting up and between the two teens, pushing them backwards.   
  
    "Mako-chan, stop this!" Nagisa said desperately.  
  
    "That killed me, Haruka!" Makoto let Nagisa push him back, body trembling, muscles tensed. "To know how much they mean to me, and you think I could hit Ren..."  
  
    "Then I guess I meant nothing to you," brittle, hollowed-out monotone, "that you could hit me, then."  
  
    Makoto's face crumpled, for that parting shot hit hard. Haru was gone before Makoto could even respond, and the other two were left completely stunned. Knowing it was futile to chase Haru down, Gou moved over to the other side of Makoto, supporting him between herself and Nagisa as the larger boy dropped to his knees, sobbing.   
  
      
    The only people who arrived together at Samezuka Academy were Rei and Nagisa, the others showed up separately. Everyone looked relieved when Haru showed up, and Haru was the first one through into the pool area. Rin noticed them, watching Haru walk in ahead of everyone else and distancing himself. Haru looked up as Rin made a beeline for him.  
  
    "You could have let me know you were ok, asshole."  
  
    "I didn't realize I was ok," Haru said dryly, voice still the same from that afternoon.  
  
    Rin grit his teeth, fingers clenching at his sides at this change in Haru. Those energetic, emotive blue eyes were...dull. The words Haru had said last night...  
  
    "Haru..." Rin whispered, raising his hands, touching Haru's cheeks tentatively. But there was no spark at his touch, and Rin felt an icy hand wrap around his heart. "Haru..Haru-chan.."  
  
    "I stopped swimming four years ago. After our last race," Haru said, staring up at Rin. His eyes, his voice, stayed utterly flat. "You cried. I wanted to hold you, but you walked away. And you never spoke to me again."  
  
    Rin's hands were starting to tremble, cupping Haru's cheeks. His lips were suddenly dry, and he found he had a hard time swallowing, unable to look away, unable to stop Haru from speaking. The others stood off to the side, rapt as they watched. Makoto stared at the ground, already knowing the story. But to Rin, no one else existed but Haru.  
  
    "I hurt you. I quit swimming that night," Haru revealed, nothing changing, watching the look of shock cross Rin's features. "You mattered to me more than water. But I...don't matter at all."  
  
    "That's not..." Rin's eyes widened, and he felt suddenly sick. "Haru..." he pulled the boy closer, ignoring the others and their own protestations, leaning down to push his forehead against Haru's. "HarHar, come on..." he whispered. "Please!"  
  
    "No," he shook his head and drew back. "That's why I'm here, now...to tell you." Haru turned his head, looking back up at Rin. "It's over...I quit."  
  
    Haru pulled away from Rin, and everyone else was far too shocked to respond before Haru was out the double doors.   
  
    It was finally Haru's turn to break.   

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Keep faith! The next chapter will be the upward rise.


	3. You Will Swim

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The aftermath of Haru's declaration of Samezuka Academy, Nagisa follows Haru to the train station. Nagisa comforts Haru which has an unintended side effect. The next day Nagisa has another talk with Haru, opening up about why he wanted to swim with them again, and after a few days, Haru goes shopping for swim suits with the others, and there he meets Rin...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The infamous fence scene...hm...wonder what happens? :x 
> 
> Enjoy!

    After the 30th buzz, Haru shut off his phone. Missed calls, text messages, voice mails...his phone had gone crazy not long after he walked out of the joint practice. They had known better than to chase him down personally, but it hadn't stopped them from trying to reach him. But he was over it.  
  
    He sat down to wait for the train, knowing he had some time ahead of him before the next one arrived. He stared straight ahead, eyes open but unseeing. Haru shed no tears, for they were frozen inside him. A wasteland of jagged, broken ice...that was the emotional tundra within him. No light, simply blackness.  
  
    He couldn't say how long he'd been sitting, staring at nothing. The train has yet to come. Though, it could have roared by, in front of his blank, expressionless eyes, once so blue and vibrant, and he wouldn't have noticed. Those eyes, which had spoken for him beyond the words he could convey, spoke nothing now. They simply pointed in the direction of his head.  
  
    What felt like a bug brushed the skin of his arm, then flew off. But that little touch seemed to penetrate, just slightly, with a blink of light in his blackness. The bug came again, a bit more firmly, before it registered that it was a touch. The touch brought fourth another bit of light, with a small rush of warmth, and it caused Haru to turn his head.  
  
    The face he saw had been doing what Haru couldn't, and was streaked with tears. Those eyes were so sad, and yet...held understanding rather than blame.  
  
    "Nagisa."  
  
    Nagisa sat down beside Haru and lifted the boy's arm, ducking under it to wrap his arms around Haru's shoulders, hugging him tightly. He rubbed his face against Haru's shoulder, sniffling softly, but he said nothing yet. Haru rested his arm around the small blond's shoulders, closing his eyes.  
  
    The warmth spread through him slowly, and though it could not entirely combat the freeze within, he felt it help. The sun that was Nagisa brought a bit of light into his blackness, and Haru tilted his head, burying his face into that fluffy blond hair, hugging Nagisa closer, trembling lightly in the boy's arms as the tears finally threatened to come.  
  
    Nagisa drew back gently, turning his head to look up at the older teen. He reached up, brushing Haru's hair back gently, touching the boy's cheek comfortingly. Those dead eyes had scared him so, so much when they first looked up at him at his touch. They were starting to show some life again, and Nagisa was starting to feel relieved.  
  
    Why was it Nagisa that could do this? Haru wondered. Broken, completely shattered, he was having a hard time trying to piece things together again. His hands rose, long fingers brushing Nagisa's cheeks, trembling still with everything that had happened. Nagisa had always been so cute, so sweet. Could...  
  
    ...and before Haru could even complete his thoughts, he found himself lunging forward, pulling Nagisa to meet him halfway. Lips came down desperately upon the smaller boy's, and Nagisa's eyes shot open wide in utter shock. Those eyes closed, and Nagisa found himself returning the kiss, for Haru's sake. The kiss ended just as abruptly as it had started, and Haru pulled back, staring at Nagisa. Nagisa's eyes opened and stared back questioningly.  
  
    "Nothing," Haru said. "Still....nothing."  
  
    "Thanks a lot, Haru-chan," Nagisa made a face. "You're lucky that wasn't my first kiss, or I'd be really pissed off!" he huffed.  
  
    Haru's eyes blinked slowly, and then it completely sank in what he'd just done. He looked away in shame and opened his mouth, but Nagisa leaned up, kissing his cheek before hugging him slowly.  
  
    "Well, I always have wondered what it would be like to kiss you," Nagisa chirped. "It's ok, Haru-chan...I understand."  
  
    "I'm sorry," Haru said anyway. "You just...make me...feel," he murmured.  
  
    "Feel what?"  
  
    "Just...feel." Haru paused, then touched Nagisa's hand gently. "Warm."  
  
    Nagisa blinked and smiled wide, flushing. He settled against Haru's side and wriggled about happily under Haru's arm.  
  
    "Really?"  
  
    Haru nodded, shifting his arm to gently scratch the back of Nagisa's head through the boy's hair, making the boy squirm about more in happiness, practically radiating sunshine.  
  
    "Nagisa..."  
  
    "Hm?"  
  
    "Why'd you follow me?"  
  
    "I wasn't going to let you be alone. At least, I'll get you back home."  
  
    "That's...it?" he murmured.  
  
    "Uh-huh. I care about you, Haru-chan. I'm worried about you."  
  
    Haru picked up on the rather pointed way Nagisa spoke in the singular, rather than saying 'we' and speaking for the others. Apparently the little blond wasn't too pleased with certain other people. The silence drifted between them but was not awkward, and Nagisa leaned against Haru until the train arrived.  
  
    "Won't the others be here for the train?"  
  
    "Nope," Nagisa said brightly.  
  
    Haru just looked at him and got to his feet once Nagisa stood. He watched the train slow, and waited for the doors to open.  
  
    "I told them they're going to take the next train after," Nagisa smiles widely, though that smile became just a touch sinister when he added darkly, "if they knew what was good for them!"  
  
    "Nagisa..." Haru blinked down at the boy.  
  
    "What?" he looked up, grinning adorably, all sunshine and kittens again.  
  
    "....never change."  
  
    "Okay!" he chirped, laughing.  
  
    They stepped into the train as the doors opened. It was thankfully rather empty, and the boys took their seats. As the doors closed, a figure came up onto the platform, too late. Haru blinked, staring at the figure with a blackening eye and blood trickling from the side of the nose. And as the train began to move, Rin shouted unheard obscenities at the closed door.  
  
    "What..." Haru got up, moving to the window and pressing his hands to it.  
  
    Rin noticed and Haru could just barely make out his name being shouted. Rin ran forward and met Haru's gaze, but didn't bother shouting, knowing the other boy couldn't hear. He ran, keeping pace with the train, staring at Haru, until he could run no more, reaching the end of the platform. When he couldn't see Rin anymore, Haru turned to Nagisa, questioning.  
  
    "After you left, no one knew what to do, really," the boy murmured. "So...Rin acted like...well, Rin...and Makoto started shouting back. They got...really ugly, and then started fighting...it took five guys on each of them to finally get them away from each other. The fight was fast, though..and then everyone tried to contact you. I didn't, though...I yelled at them and told them to avoid the train and followed you. When you didn't move for a while, I got worried..."  
  
    Haru settled down beside Nagisa, leaning his head back against the window.  
  
    "Haru...I never knew that's why you stopped swimming," Nagisa said softly. "I..I feel bad, for making you start again."  
  
    "It's okay...I just...thought that..."  
  
    Haru couldn't finish, doubling over with his head between his knees, hands clasping over the back of his head as he shook, the tears finally coming. Nagisa rubbed Haru's back, knowing nothing he said would be comforting. Haru wasn't sobbing, but it was from sheer willpower alone that he wasn't. Nagisa did his best to just comfort Haru without saying anything, and when the train arrived, he got Haru home and into bed.  
  
    The house was empty when Haru woke up. He sat up in bed and rested his head in his hands, fingers curled through his hair. He didn't want to face today. He forced himself out of bed, heading into the bathroom to start the tub, watching it fill with water as he stripped down. He still had some time before school at least, and slipped into the water, letting himself sink beneath the surface.  
  
    He soaked in the warm water, feeling cold again. Not as frozen as he had last night, but last night hadn't much helped him after his shameless lapse. He had just wanted to kiss...and to FEEL. The warmth Nagisa gave him, he had completely mistaken it, and he'd known better. Surfacing again, he took a deep breath of air. He climbed out of the tub and began to dry off. He saw the dolphin statue and swiped it with his hand, knocking it into the trash before he went into his room.  
  
    Haru changed into his school uniform, made himself some mackerel and some for lunch, before he left for school. As he approached Iwatobi, he spotted Rei, Nagisa, and Makoto standing by the gates. Comparing what he saw of Rin last night and seeing Makoto now, it looked as if Rin had won the fight between them, as Makoto definitely looked worse for wear.  
  
    "Haru-chan..." Makoto stepped forward hesitantly.  
  
    "Don't call me that," Haru snapped, causing Makoto's steps to falter.  
  
    "Haru...please, just..."  
  
    "Don't call me Haru, either."  
  
    "What?" Makoto asked, stricken.  
  
    Haru turned away and caught Nagisa's eyes. He just nodded to the little blonde, and Nagisa gave Haru a tiny, relieved smile.  
  
    "Haru-chan..." Nagisa moved forward, sliding his arm through Haru's.  
  
    "Drop the -chan."  
  
    "Never!" Nagisa smiled brightly, tugging Haru away from Makoto, glancing back at Makoto with a look that said 'let me handle this.'  
  
    "What is it, Nagisa?"  
  
    "Haru-chan, I'm not going to make you do anything. I'm even being good and not going to beg! Because you know I could beg and beg and beg and get you to join the team again," Nagisa grinned cutely.  
  
    "Hn," Haru neither agreed nor disagreed. Though he knew Nagisa was probably right.  
  
    "I just wanted to say...that despite Mako-chan acting like a big, dumb oaf..you know he still cares. And Rei-chan was worried about you, too. He really wanted to see you swim, I told him how beautiful you were when you swam and everything, it's why he came..."  
  
    Haru looked away, mildly embarrassed at the praise.  
  
    "Anyway...if you need to stay away from swimming, it's okay."  
  
    Haru looked down at Nagisa, surprised. He had to admit, when he saw Nagisa last night, and again this morning, he had expected the boy to launch straight into ways to get him to come back to the team. And both times he had been surprised. Nagisa was looking up at him, smiling warmly.  
  
    "What we had as kids, with you, me, Rin, and Makoto...it was special, and I...I missed it when we all split up. When I saw you and Mako-chan again...I wanted to be special again. I've never had friends like you guys..." Nagisa looked down.  
  
    "Nagisa..." Haru murmured, touching the boy's shoulder.  
  
    "I'm always teased...you saw it, that time with my sister's swimsuit...and when you wore it, I couldn't...I couldn't believe someone would do that...for me." Nagisa wiped at his eyes, looking up at Haru. "I'm teased all the time...but when I was with you guys...when I was at the swim club...I never was. I was...a boy, and I had friends. I just...I wanted that again. I didn't know...it would end up hurting you so much. I don't want you to hurt again...not because of me."  
  
    Haru stepped forward, pulling Nagisa into him,hugging the boy tightly. Nagisa hugged back, sniffling softly. He buried his face against Haru's chest to hide his tears...and his smirk.  
  
    "I'm happy just to be your friend again, Haru-chan..."  
  
    "...I'll come back," Haru said quietly.  "But not right away."  
  
    With that, Haru let Nagisa go and headed inside the school. Nagisa watched the doors close behind Haru.  
  
    "DA DA DA DA, DA...DA...DA-DA-DA!!!!" Nagisa screamed the Final Fantasy victory theme, doing an energetic little jig in a circle as Makoto and Rei walked up, staring.  
  
    "Did you...?" Rei frowned.  
  
    "He's gonna come back!" Nagisa danced around, still singing the victory theme.  
  
    "Nagisa..." Makoto stared. "You're...amazing."  
  
    "I know!" Nagisa gave a thumbs up, then heard the bell ring, screeching, "WE'RE GONNA BE LAAAAAATE!"  
  
    Turning, he sprinted into the school. Makoto and Rei looked at each other, stunned.  
  
    "I...have never come across anyone like him before," Rei muttered.  
  
    "And you never will again, I promise," Makoto chuckled, heading into the school with Rei.  
  
      
    Just as Haru had said, he didn't come back right away. In fact, it had started to seem like Haru wouldn't be coming back at all, as long as he was letting it pass. Finally Nagisa showed up at Haru's house, heading inside to find Haru soaking in the tub.  
  
    "Haru! We're going swimsuit shopping! Come with us."  
  
    "Why?"  
  
    "Because Rei-chan is mean and thinks my totally cute penguin speedos are making him a bad swimmer!" Nagisa pouted.  
  
    "Why should I go, though?"  
  
    "Weeeell...." Nagisa reached out a hand, helping Haru stand. "Because! Don't you need a new suit?"  
  
    "I suppose..." Haru said thoughtfully.  
  
    "So, you'll have a new suit when you decide to swim with us again!" Nagisa said brightly.  
  
    "...fine," Haru finally agreed, going to get changed.  
  
    Rei and Makoto were waiting outside Haru's house, and Haru greeted Rei with a small nod. His eyes flicked briefly to Makoto, but that was the only acknowledgement given. Gou met them at the station, and she gave Haru a small smile.  
  
    "It's good to have you join us, Haruka-san," she murmured.  
  
    The trip was rather boring, both Haru and Makoto rather subdued. Upon reaching the shop, Haru managed to find a few suits he wanted to try, and everyone was becoming a bit more animated as they tried on suit after suit. Except for Gou, who started to droop after a while. One could only have so much muscle-envy, after all.  
  
    "Nitori?"  
  
    Haru heard a familiar voice as he stepped out of his changing room, turning just as Rin did.  
  
    "Haru?!"  
  
    "Rin..." Haru frowned.  
  
    "I...wanted to talk to you. Come with me?"  
  
    At Haru's quiet nod, they each stepped back into their changing rooms and got dressed. Haru followed Rin outside, and Rin sat down on a planter while Haru leaned against the chainlink fence nearby. He crossed his arms, staring at the sky as he waited for Rin to talk.  
  
    "That night, I wondered how it was I beat you. I couldn't do it when I came back those years ago...I still find it hard to believe you quit because of that."  
  
    "I couldn't stand to see you cry."  
  
    "Are you mocking me?" Rin frowned.  
  
    "No," Haru looked over. "You won our race, Rin...a win is a win. Isn't that good enough?"  
  
    "It wasn't a real race! It's not the same!" Rin shook his head. "And now you've gone and quit again, and now...now I can't move on."  
  
    Swimming again. Would this always come between them? Is the water going to be what kept them apart?  
  
    "You're a pain," Haru muttered, turning away. "I only swim Free...and I won't swim for you."  
  
    Rin growled as Haru began to walk away. He was up on his feet, overtaking Haru easily and grabbing the boy's shoulder, spinning him around and shoving him up against the chainlink fence, gripping it on either side of the boy's shoulders.  
  
    "No," Rin growled, staring into those startled eyes, "you WILL swim for me!"  
  
    Haru stared into Rin's eyes, and he was tired. Tired of the games. Tired of being yanked back and forth by his emotions. Tired...of being fucking manhandled. He gripped the fence, then brought his hand up to force Rin's arms away from him...and instead punched Rin across the face. Rin's head snapped up and those eyes widened in shock as he staggered back.  
  
    Haru moved away from the fence as Rin let out a howl of rage, body slamming into Haru's and forcing the boy back up against the fence, fist driving into Haru's gut. Haru's hands came up as he gasped, gripping Rin's shoulders and twisting, forcing them back until Rin was the one pinned, and his fist came down hard across Rin's face again.  
  
    Both boys fought viciously for the upper hand, lips and noses bleeding, knuckles bruised. Before either of them knew it, they were on the ground, Haru having managed to force Rin to the concrete, pinning the other teen's wrists to the sidewalk. Bleeding, breathing hard, Haru stared down at Rin...and kissed him.  
  
    Blood mingled with blood, tasting each other, lips fighting as viciously as the boy's had for dominance in the kiss. Their tongues met between their lips, jabbing and thrusting against the other, teasing, warring together. Rin forced them around so Haru was beneath him, up around his waist, and Haru locked his ankles behind Rin's back to keep him close. Haru rocked his hips, grinding his erection against Rin's through their clothes, and Rin groaned into his mouth.  
  
    Rin's fingers curled into Haru's hair, yanking the boy's head back, breaking their kiss. Haru let out a gasp, followed by a groan as Rin's tongue slid along his neck, feeling Rin's hips grinding against his. He felt Rin's lips part, and those sharp teeth teased along his neck, the points scraping lightly over skin. Haru tightened his legs around Rin's waist, hands moving to grip Rin's shoulders as he rolled his hips back against Rin's.  
  
    "Do it," Haru hissed, gasping.  
  
    "What?" Rin blinked, panting a bit as he rocked back.  
  
    "Fucking BITE ME!"  
  
    Rin moaned and felt the world go hazy. Sharp teeth sunk into Haru's neck deeply, and as his teeth sank in to the boy's skin he felt himself completely erupt into the suit he wore under his pants, filling it with his cum as his mouth nearly filled with Haru's blood.  
  
    The pain in his neck, Rin's teeth biting into him, and the shuddering of Rin's body against him sent Haru over, feeling his own release into his own suit. He hissed through his teeth, gripping Rin's shoulders before he went limp against the sidewalk, panting raggedly. It didn't matter that they'd literally beaten each other bloody minutes before...or that they were pretty much in public on a sidewalk.  
  
    Or that Gou had watched the entire thing and felt incredibly dirty at just having gawked at her older brother and Haruka pretty much getting it on.  
  
    "What...the fuck...was that?" Rin gasped, staring down at Haru.  
  
    "Fun?" Haru gave a tiny smirk.  
  
    Rin stared at Haru, shocked, before he burst out laughing. He hid his face in his hand and stood, making a slightly disgusted noise as he felt the slimy slickness in his suit.  
  
    "Ugh...gross."  
  
    Haru took Rin's hand when it was offered, getting to his feet, and his face also fell into a disgusted sort of look, shifting on his feet.  
  
    "You made me ruin my suit," Haru said simply.  
  
    "ME!?"  
  
    "You."  
  
    Rin huffed and watched Haru. He relaxed slowly, reaching out to take Haru's hand, drawing the boy close. Haru moved against Rin, leaning on his chest gently.  
  
    "Are...we cool, now?"  
  
    "Yeah...we're cool," Haru murmured.  
  
    Face bright red, Gou turned as she heard the rest of the Iwatobi club head out of the store..and lead them the other way. She didn't want them seeing Haru and Rin like that, all bruised and bloody...and sated.  
  
    "You owe me a suit."  
  
    "Ass," Rin huffed. "Fine...I'll buy you one, if you buy me one."  
  
    "Fine."  
  
    Rin shook his head and slid his arm around Haru's shoulders. Haru leaned against Rin, an arm sliding around the boy's waist, and smiled softly. Together, they walked into the store to get their new suits.


	4. Leaving

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rin and Haru meet up with the others outside. Haru has come to a decision...one necessary for Makoto to begin healing.

    They looked like shit. Dirty, torn clothes and bruised, bloodied faces, Haru with a rather vicious-looking bite mark on his neck...it was no wonder the clerk had just stared at them, hand hovering over the phone, wondering if the police should be called. They paid for their purches though, then exchanged bags.   
  
    "You look like shit," Rin said, smirking as he glanced over at Haru.  
  
    "You don't look much better."  
  
    Rin caught a glimpse of his reflection and snickered softly, putting his arm around Haru again as they headed for the front of the store.   
  
    "I can't believe you fucking punched me!"  
  
    "You deserved it."  
  
    Rin laughed softly and shrugged, rubbing his jaw lightly.   
  
    "I guess so. I'm....sorry, Haru," Rin murmured.  
  
    "It's fine."  
  
    "I think you punch harder than Makoto."   
  
    Haru's face went stoic and blank, eyes turning away from Rin. Rin tightened his arm around Haru, silently cursing himself for that. He was relieved Haru didn't pull away though, and just leaned against his side, one of Haru's hands coming up to hold the hand he had on Haru's shoulder.   
  
    "I don't..." Haru began as they stepped outside, but didn't have the chance to finish his sentence.   
  
    "HARU-CHAN! We've been wait--...RIN-CHAN!" the pink-eyed blond stopped in his tracks, staring.    
  
    Haru turned his head away and idly pressed his face against Rin's shoulder, cheeks flushing. Nagisa laughed and clapped his hands brightly.  
  
    "You guys made up! But what happened, were you attacked?"  
  
    "Um..not exactly," Rin said.  
  
    Gou was looking anywhere but at her brother and Haru, her face going red. Makoto stared at them, taking in their messy looks, eyes lingering on the bite mark on Haru's neck. His hands curled into fists.   
  
    "What bit you, Haruka-senpai?" Rei asked, adjusting his glasses.   
  
    Nagisa walked around them, looking them over head to toe, then grinned more.   
  
    "Rin-chan did..you two fought and then made out didn't you!?"  
  
    "Can we not talk about what MY BROTHER may or may not have done behind the store, please?!" Gou squeaked.  
  
    "How did you know where...?" Rin frowned.  
  
    "OHMYGOD!" Nagisa shrieked. "That's why you sent us in the other direction! You saw them!"  
  
    Haru's eyes went wide, turning to look at Gou. Rin's face went about as red as Gou's, and she hid her face, nodding.   
  
    "How much did you..."  
  
    "Most of it," Gou whimpered.   
  
    "What were they doing!?" Nagisa hopped up and down.  
  
    "Nagisa! That's private!" Rei exclaimed, scadalized.  
  
    "Not when they're doing it IN PUBLIC! I didn't know you had it in you Haru..." Nagisa waggled his brows, giggling.  
  
    "We didn't do THAT!" Rin huffed.   
  
    "Can we..."  
  
    "So it's ok if he hits you."  
  
    Haru had just been about to ask for a change of subject...and Makoto's voice cut through everyone's chatter, the silence after almost deafening. Makoto was glaring at them, fisted hands trembling at his sides. Everyone's eyes turned to him, shocked.   
  
    "He..." Rin began angrily, voice heated, when Haru stopped him, the back of his hand lifted up to press against Rin's chest lightly.  Rin looked down at Haru, and the boy simply shook his head, turning his gaze to Makoto coolly.   
  
    "I threw the first punch," Haru said quietly. "We FOUGHT, Makoto. That's a little bit different than someone standing there and letting someone they love hit them, bruise them."  
  
    "Haru...I..."  
  
    "I told you not to call me that."  
  
    Haru looked away as Makoto hung his head. The others could just stare, unable to act, to interfere. Haru pulled away from Rin and stepped closer to Makoto, hands at his sides and turning his gaze back slowly.   
  
    "I can't keep doing this, Makoto. I can't, it hurts too much. You've always been my closest friend, and I never wanted that to change. I never wanted anything like this...that's why I resisted you for so long.  I knew, Makoto...I knew I could never give you what you deserved. And that's why I didn't fight you when everything started to happen."  
  
    Makoto looked down, the tears running down his face. Haru moved closer, reaching up to touch his fingertips to Makoto's cheeks.  
  
    "Now I don't know what to do. I don't know how to fix you, Makoto...and you've always known how to fix me. I think you were right, even though it hurt so much. We need to be away from each other before you can start to heal."  
  
    "But..."  
  
    "How can we do that, being in the Swim Club, in the same classes? I know."  
  
    Haru cupped Makoto's cheek gently, sighing. He let his hand drop away and stepped back, looking to Rin, to the others.   
  
    "Nagisa...I'm sorry I can't keep my promise to come back to the swim club," Haru said softly. "I expect you to take care of Makoto, okay?"  
  
    "Haru-chan..." Nagisa frowned.  
  
    "Haruka-senpai..." Rei frowned softly.  
  
    "Makoto needs to heal. I had thought about this...but, wasn't sure...with how badly Rin and I got along..." he looked over at the redhead, giving a small smile. "But now..."  
  
    "You're..." Rin's eyes went wide, the realization sinking in.   
  
    "You're leaving Iwatobi, aren't you, Haruka-senpai?" Gou asked, frowning.  
  
    "NO!" Nagisa and Makoto both shouted, shocked.  
  
    "Yes..." Haru nodded softly. "It's...for the best. For Makoto's best. You've sacrificed enough, Makoto. Including yourself. That stops now. Now you can heal...and if...if after, you can stand to see me again..."  
  
    "Haruka..." Makoto swallowed hard, the name unfamiliar on his tongue.  
  
    "Please...Makoto...get better. Not for me...for you."  
  
    Makoto sniffled, nodding softly. Nagisa ran up to Haru, hugging him tightly.  
  
    "We're going to visit you! A lot! And...we'll have a party to break in your dorm, okay? And I'll text you all the time! And I'll send you mackerel care packages!"   
  
    Haru blinked and hugged Nagisa back, stroking the blond hair gently. He couldn't help a quiet chuckle, looking down at Nagisa.   
  
    "Keep me updated," Haru said quietly to Nagisa.  
  
    Nagisa nodded, smiling brightly. He stepped away from Haru and Rei stepped up, bowing respectfully.  
  
    "I'm sorry I couldn't see you swim, Haruka-senpai. Hopefully someday in the future!"  
  
    Haru just nodded as Gou came forward.  
  
    "I expect you to keep managing them, don't let them stop."  
  
    "Don't worry, Haruka-senpai. I'll keep them going."  
  
    "Good."  
  
    Rin came up, putting his arm around Haru.  
  
    "You've really been planning this?"  
  
    "For a bit. I knew Makoto wasn't healing..." Haru looked away. "And I figured maybe..."  
  
    "It might get you closer to me?"  
  
    Haru just nodded, flushing, and Rin burst out laughing.  
  
    "I almost wish this hadn't happened...I wonder what I would have done, seeing you at Samezuka? Probably flipped a shit."  
  
    "Hn...should we break up?"  
  
    "What? No!" Rin laughed. "Now I can beat you EVERY. DAY."  
  
    "We'll see..." Haru murmured.  
  
    "Pff, please. You lost to me already."  
  
    "Fluke," Haru said, walking off towards the train station.  
  
    "Fluke?! Listen here, asshole..."  
  
    Bickering, they walked away, holding their bags.   
  
      
    Makoto watched, then glanced down as he felt a small hand in his, seeing Nagisa beside him. Nagisa entwined their fingers and squeezed gently, turning his gaze up to Makoto.   
  
    "I'm sorry...for running Haru off," Makoto said quietly, voice trembling.  
  
    "No...you didn't, Mako-chan. You know how they say...if you love something, let it go?"  
  
    Makoto frowned, nodding.  
  
    "You're his closest friend...and you're hurting. You can't heal with him around...so...he stopped holding on. He loves you, Mako-chan. He let you go."  
  
    Makoto turned and picked the much shorter boy up in a tight hug...and began sobbing into Nagisa's shoulder. Nagisa blinked rapidly, but slowly wrapped his arms awkwardly around Makoto's shoulders, feet dangling above the ground.   
  
    "Now, now..." Nagisa said softly, stroking Makoto's hair. "I feel like a teddy bear," he giggled softly.  
  
    Makoto laughed through his sobs, nuzzling his face against Nagisa's shoulder as he cried into it, squeezing the boy.  
  
    "You make a good one," he mumbled.  
  
      
    "You think this is really what Makoto needs?" Rin murmured.  
  
    Haru glanced back to see Makoto lift Nagisa off his feet and start sobbing. His hand gripped Rin's tightly, almost painfully, but Rin said nothing. He looked back as well, then back to Haru.  
  
    "Yeah...I think it really is," Haru said softly.   
  
    "I...hope you're right."  
  
    "Me, too," Haru whispered, looking away.   
  
    Together, they headed to the train station, leaving the others in the parking lot.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I toyed with this decision for a while...and honestly, it's the only way I saw Makoto even beginning to heal, rather than being faced with Haru every day. I don't think he could otherwise.


	5. You're Not Alone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Makoto's been isolating himself. There's one person who can pull him free...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you ALL for all your patience with me! I've deviated from my norm for this chapter because I felt we needed to see Makoto. I hope you enjoy it. This concludes the Tangled portion of the In The Net series!

    Makoto had barely removed his hand from the doorbell when the front door opened, Nagisa smiling brightly at the tall brunet from within.  
  
    "Mako-chan! I'm glad you came!"   
  
    "What's wrong, Nagisa?"  
      
    "Nothing!" the small blond chirped, grinning widely.  
  
    "Nothing? But...you said..."  
  
    "It was the only thing I could think of to get you over here!" Nagisa reached out, grabbing Makoto's hand with both of his own, tugging the older teen inside. "You've been moping all week! You won't come out with us..."  
  
    "Nagisa..." Makoto tried to pull his hand back, but couldn't seem to get out of Nagisa's iron-like grip, eyes widening a bit when he realized Nagisa wouldn't be letting him go.  
  
    "It's just me, Mako-chan! Come on, I'm going to help you."  
  
    "Help...me?" Makoto frowned, reluctantly following the younger blond into the house.   
  
    "Uh-huh! I know you're still really upset, and hurt...and you probably are just keeping it all to yourself right now. So I'm gonna show you what I do when I'm hurt, or really mad, and just wanna let it out."  
  
    "You get mad?" Makoto looked at Nagisa, letting out a little smile.  
  
    "I get a lot of things, Mako-chan," Nagisa pulled Makoto up the stairs, pausing in front of his bedroom. "Now, we're going to go into my room, and you can be as loud as you want, we're alone!" he grinned brightly.  
  
    "B...be....NAGISA!?" Makoto gawked a bit, cheeks flushing.  
  
    "Not like that, silly!" Nagisa smirked cutely, shaking his head.   
  
    Nagisa turned the knob of his bedroom door slowly and pushed it open, stepping back and waving Makoto in ahead of him. Makoto stared at Nagisa for a moment, unsure, before turning towards the boy's bedroom, stepping inside carefully. He didn't know what was waiting, but what he saw...he surely hadn't been expecting it.  
  
    The small blond's room was almost literally filled with rolls of bubble wrap. Small rolls, large rolls, and even a HUGE roll. It stood almost four feet tall, and about as wide. Makoto's mouth hung agape, eyes taking in the bubble wrap paradise before him before turning his questioning gaze on Nagisa, who was now standing by his side, grinning brightly.  
  
    "What...?"   
  
    "Bubble wrap!" Nagisa chirped excitedly. He grabbed a small roll and held it between his hands, giving it a rough twist as if snapping a neck, the loud pops and crackles filling the room. "Whenever I feel angry, or hurt...I use this! It's satisfying!"  
  
    "How?"  
  
    Nagisa released an exasperated sigh and tilted his head at Makoto, grinning and simply handing him the roll. Makoto frowned and took it, then gripped it as Nagisa had. Looking down at it, he glanced back up at Nagisa, who was looking a bit impatient and gave Makoto a go-on sort of motion. Sighing softly, he looked back down at it and wrenched it.   
  
    The feel beneath his hands, the pop and crackles that filled his ears...he felt a bit of tension drain from his shoulders, a small tingle running down his spine. He blinked in surprise, glancing up at Nagisa. The younger boy clapped happily, giggling.   
  
    "Feels good, right?"  
  
    "Yeah..." Makoto nodded, squeezing the roll again and giving a faint smile at the popping sound.   
  
    "Good! Now, I'm going to leave you alone...so...do what you want. Let it out, Mako-chan....you need to. And when you're done, I'll show you the best thing to do with the big one, ok?"  
  
    "I..." Makoto stared at Nagisa, giving a soft smile, reminiscent of his natural smile, happy and warm. "Nagisa..."  
  
    "Shh," Nagisa placed a finger over the teen's lips. "What are friend's for, Mako-chan?" Raising up on his tip-toes, he had to hop still to place a kiss on Makoto's cheek. "Just...let go. I'll be back in an hour!"   
  
    Turning, Nagisa headed out of his room, letting the door close behind him. He waited a bit, starting to hear the pops start slowly, but soon they picked up pace. Thumps, thuds, clunks...when he heard the first shout was when he made his way down the hall.   
  
      
    An hour later, as promised, Nagisa was back. He knocked on the door to his bedroom first before opening it slowly, easing inside. His room was practically trashed, with ripped bubble wrap littering the floor and his bed. His pile of stuffed animals was scattered, and he saw Makoto sitting on his bed, head hanging down, elbows resting on his knees.   
  
    "Feeling better?" Nagisa asked, walking over and sitting down beside the brunet, offering him the cold glass of water he'd brought.   
  
    "Yeah..." Makoto took it gratefully, raising his other hand to wipe under his eyes. He took a drink, the water cooling his raw throat.  "Thanks. I..I really do."  
  
    "Good." Nagisa grinned brightly, getting up. He saw the disaster area seemed to avoid the huge roll of bubble wrap. "You left the big one alone!"  
  
    "Yeah..." Makoto sniffed softly and smiled faintly, raising his head to look at Nagisa. "You said you'd show me something with that?"   
  
    "Uh-huh!" Nagisa bopped over to the roll, pushing it onto its side. "Now watch!"   
  
    Nagisa leaned over the large roll of bubble wrap, his chest pressed to the sealed air bubbles. He hooked his fingers into either end of the hollow tube, then kicked off the floor. He rolled with the bubble wrap, laughing happily as he rolled around his bedroom floor, leaving the sounds of popping in his wake. Makoto couldn't help but laugh, shaking his head as Nagisa popped up to his feet.  
  
    "Now you try!"  
  
    "I don't think..."  
  
    "Mako-chaaaaaaaaaaaan!" Nagisa put on his best puppy face.  
  
    "Fine, fine..." Makoto acquiesced, laughing softly. He stood up, setting the water aside and walking over. He grabbed the large roll carefully, awkwardly flipping over and oomphing as he thumped rather heavily to the ground. But...the popping sound was a big satisfying.   
  
    "You'll get the hang of it! Try again!"   
  
    "Nagisa..."  
  
    "Mako-chan, you are going to have fun. No arguments!" the little blond huffed, making a face at the larger teen.  
  
    Knowing it was essentially pointless to argue with Nagisa at this point, Makoto gave the boy a small smile and tried again. A chuckle escaped him as he managed to roll a few times, causing more pops and crackles to fill the room.  
  
    "Good! Now, I've always wanted to try this, Mako-chan...pick it up and hold it!"  
  
    Blinking, Makoto got to his feet, picking up the large, hefty roll with his fingers hooked firmly in the tube, holding it against his chest and looking to Nagisa curiously. Nagisa walked over, gripping the tube in the same way.  
  
    "Mako-chan!" Nagisa's whine was muffled against the bubble wrap. Being only chest-level with the brunet, practically, his face was pressed right into the air bubbles. "Lower it!"  
  
    "Like this?" Makoto lowered it down a bit so it was pressed to his lower stomach, Nagisa's head becoming visible now over the top as they held the roll sandwiched between them.  
  
    "Good! Now try and pin me!"  
  
    "Wait, what?!" Makoto exclaimed. "Nagisa, you could get hurt!"   
  
    "Well, then go easy on my and let me win!" the younger teen said, shoving his body against the tube and pushing it against Makoto, the sound of crackling bubbles filling the air as he caused Makoto to tumble back lightly by about a step.   
  
    "Hey!" Makoto said, pushing back firmly, the bubble wrap knocking harder into Nagisa.   
  
    Squeeling, the smaller boy fell back, tripping over a stray stuffed penguin. He fell backwards, his foot knocking into Makoto's and bringing the larger brunet down on top of him. Nagisa's eyes nearly bugged out of his head, though the bubble wrap cushioned Makoto's fall onto him. The loud explosion of pops was the most satisfying yet.   
  
    "Nagisa!" Makoto nearly let go, concern all over his face.   
  
    "You..got...lucky!" Nagisa huffed, trying to catch his breath as he wriggled around under Makoto, managing to flip them around and rolling on top of the larger boy with the roll of bubble wrap between them.   
  
    The bubble-wrap-wrestling ensued with both boys rolling around the floor, the bubble wrap popping and crackling between them as their bodies thumped against it. It wasn't long before both boys lay panting and sweaty on the floor, the bubblewrap having rolled away. Makoto and Nagisa lay on their backs, panting to catch their breaths, turning their heads slowly to look at each other.   
  
    Makoto and Nagisa were both incredibly disheveled, hair standing up all over the place, their clothing rumpled, riding up their abs a bit to show flashes of skin beneath. Taking in each other's appearance, both boys burst into laughter. Nagisa rolled over, flopping an arm and a leg across Makoto's body, resting his chin on the larger male's chest as his pink eyes gazed up at Makoto.   
  
    "It doesn't fix everything," Nagisa said softly, "but it helps. You can just....forget about the world for a little bit. Take things out on something that won't be hurt."  
  
    Makoto nodded, curling an arm around Nagisa's smaller body slowly, bringing his other hand up to brush through the blond's hair.   
  
    "I feel a lot better, thanks, Nagisa," Makoto smiled warmly at the small blond.  
  
    "Good," Nagisa scooted up, kissing Makoto's chin lightly.   
  
    Makoto blinked a bit, looking down at Nagisa, meeting the boy's pink gaze. Nagisa stared a moment, watching Makoto's reaction, before he leaned up, brushing his lips against the larger swimmer's. When Makoto didn't protest, Nagisa kissed him a little more firmly, sliding his body onto Makoto's completely. He felt Makoto's arms wrap slowly around him, the teen's larger hands rubbing along his back carefully.   
  
    "Nagisa..."  
  
    "I don't expect anything, Mako-chan. I know it still hurts. But I'm here for you. We all are. And...if...when you're ready...or, you know...if you wanna just..." Nagisa grinned brightly, "...rebound your hips off my ass..."  
  
    "NAGISA!" Makoto nearly choked, face going red. He shook his head as Nagisa winked and laughed, kissing his nose. "Nagisa...your innocence is all a lie. I'm shocked," he huffed, teasing.  
  
    Nagisa stuck out his tongue and sat up, settling down straddling Makoto's hips, very mildly grinding his ass down over the brown-haired boy's crotch.   
  
    "Well, the offer's there..." he purred playfully, feeling Makoto's hips arch under him, giggling at the boy's blush, "... _CAPTAIN_."  
  
    "You little shit," Makoto grunted softly, moving his hands to Nagisa's hips, squeezing them gently as the boy continued to playfully grind on him.   
  
    "Mako-chan! Such language!" Nagisa said with feigned innocence, batting his lashes down at Makoto as he continued to move slowly.   
  
    Makoto flipped them over, the bubble wrap strewn over the floor popping as they rolled over it. He pinned Nagisa down, leaning in and kissing the boy tenderly despite the rough action. Nagisa wrapped his legs around Makoto's waist, resting his hands on the boy's shoulders as he kissed back slowly, flicking his tongue over Makoto's lips.   
  
    The older teen's tongue eased inward, parting Nagisa's lips slowly and dipping into the boy's mouth, feeling Nagisa's tongue rise to meet his own. Their tongues swirled, Makoto shivering as he felt the slightly bumpy texture of the top of Nagisa's tongue sliding along the underside of his own. Makoto's tongue curled up to slide along the roof of Nagisa's mouth.  
  
    The smaller blond pressed his hips up, feeling Makoto's hardness against him through their clothes. He rolled his hips slowly, raising his legs a bit higher on Makoto's body, keeping them wrapped around the more muscular brunet. More little pops filled the room as they moved against the air bubbles beneath them. Makoto groaned into the kiss, pressing his hips down against Nagisa before he broke the kiss to give a small gasp for air.  
  
    "I..I don't think..."  
  
    "It's okay..." Nagisa's flushed face looked up at Makoto, reaching up to touch the older teen's cheek. "It's fine."  
  
    "Ok..." Makoto leaned down, kissing Nagisa's nose gently, making him giggle and wrinkle it. "I should probably go..."  
  
    "Are you sure?"  
  
    "Yeah. I need to watch Ren and Ran tonight..."  
  
    "Well, if you ever need my bubble wrap again, you can come over!" Nagisa smiled.  
  
    "I'll remember that," Makoto smiled, getting to his feet. Reaching down, he grasped Nagisa's hand and helped him up, pulling the smaller teen into a tight hug. "Thank you again."  
  
    "What are friends for?" Nagisa nuzzled into Makoto's strong chest gently. "And if you ever wanna re-..."  
  
    "Nagisa..." Makoto placed his hand over the boy's mouth gently. "I'm not...going to use you. I'd rather...how about...dinner, sometime soon, instead?"  
  
    Nagisa's eyes widened and he smiled under Makoto's hand, licking the boy's palm to make him jerk his hand back with a slightly startled face, laughing.   
  
    "Ok, dinner it is, Mako-chan!" Nagisa said happily, hopping up to kiss Makoto's chin. "Call me, ok? And stop avoiding us!"  
  
    "Ok, ok..." Makoto kissed the top of Nagisa's head. "I will, I promise."  
  
    "Good. If I catch you moping again I'll tie you up with bubble wrap and kidnap you!"  
  
    Makoto shook his head, laughing softly. He drew Nagisa close, hugging the boy tightly and leaning down so he could kiss Nagisa's forehead.   
  
    "See you later, then."  
  
    "Later!" Nagisa chirped happily, waving to Makoto as the brunet turned and left.   
  
    As the door closed, Nagisa clapped his hands and did a little victory dance, grinning brightly to himself. He was going to get the old Makoto back, and nothing was going to stop him!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Many thanks to Distant-Glory's Eighty-Three Percent series. Read it if you haven't! I told her I'd do something with the bubble wrap bit. I didn't get as explicit as I had wanted to but who knows, it may make another appearance....


End file.
